"Oh, you are still a small child,son- you must eat all of this, but we are old now so we should eat less food."
This is what grandma says in her usual persuasive manner,whenever I get irked with her for trying to serve me some of her lunch too.Though I would maintain vigourously that old age definitely does not mean denial of good things in life, I seldom stop for some re-thinking. After all, if thats what I really believe , I should be living it too.
Instead I find myself foremost in a world participating in the heart-rending game of ignoring it's old 'uns.
There is a ritual observed in Hinduism which is prevalent in South India, called keeping "Pindam", which involves (as i remember) placing balls of cooked rice for crows to come and eat. This is done on some particular day after a near one has passed away in the family. It is believed that if the crows dont come eat the rice, the soul of the departed would never find peace.
The old lady who has the local bus stop for a home,was abandoned there by her children after they had it with her incessant quarreling. Her children made sure they kept "Pindam" right in front of her before they left for good. That was someway to say "You are dead to us,mom". I have no clue which was worse- the horrors of seeing her children keep her "Pindam" while she was alive, or the fact that they didnt wait for the crows to come and eat the offering.
While most senior citizens dont face such distressing situations,it would be worth it to step into their shoes once in a while.
Your friends seldom call, your own family treats you like an expensive liability, you are rattled by more than one illness simultaneously, your mobile phone receives rare calls and even rarer messages, the world exists to make you feel all the more worse- once a vitality, now an infirmity.. once looking forward, now hoping to be in reverse gear.
Questions keep haunting me now and then- when I become old,am I to expect lesser love from my family? Should I expect others to misunderstand me over every little thing? Should I expect less hugs and lesser kisses then? Will my family assume that the tv will keep me spell-bound? Will my joys and my wounds seem to them of lesser worth and not much of a bother? Just because I am headed for the grave,will I get a kick in my rear and a card saying "Get There Soon !" ? I could go on and on.The Black Eyed Peas puts it so precisely - " As I get older, you people get colder.. "
What happened to the old lady at the bus stop?
I longed to see her warm in the thundering rains. I wished so much that she would stop smoking(so much for geriatrics). Of course the utmost I would do would be to smile at her while walking past. No point blaming me- who would want to talk to such an obnoxious and rude person?
After a few months, her daughter came riding by in a car.
And they took her home. Whatever caused that decision, hope she is receiving real geriatrics.
